EPISODE SUMMARY
The Little Jerry
Plot
At Monk's, Kramer tells Jerry that the owner of a nearby bodega, Marcelino (Miguel Sandoval),
posted one of Jerry's bounced checks on his cash-register, along with the other bad ones. The check has a picture of a clown holding balloons.
At this moment, George walks into the restaurant, in a very happy mood. He explains thatThe Susan Ross Foundation made a large donation to a women's prison, and he gets to go there to "check it out." Elaine then makes an entrance, introducing her new boyfriend Kurt (John Michael Higgins), who shaves his head.
Jerry goes to the bodega where his check is, and pays Marcelino what he owes. Marcelino, however, refuses to take the check down under "store policy." George goes to the women's prison, and meets the warden: Betsy (Kathryn Joosten), but is disappointed as to how tame and peaceful the building is.
George then proceeds to ask "out" the prison's librarian, Celia (Andrea Bendewald), finding many pros with dating a woman who's in jail.
Kramer announces that he bought what he thinks is a hen (whom he named "Little Jerry Seinfeld") for its eggs, but later finds out that it is a rooster.
Meanwhile, Elaine is thoroughly disappointed in Kurt's bald head after seeing the hair he could have if he didn't keep shaving it off. She persuades him to regrow his hair, but is even more shocked to discover that he's going bald. He soon proposes to Elaine in order to have as much time with her as possible before he goes completely bald.
Marcelino convinces Kramer to put Little Jerry in a cock fight, which he winds up winning. Marcelino then makes a deal with Jerry: he'll take his check down only if he can have Little Jerry. Kramer strongly opposes this transaction, though. When George finds out that Celia is up for parole, he desperately tries to put a stop to it, judging that he interacts with her better when she's in prison. He succeeds in preventing her from getting the parole, but doesn't stop her from unexpectedly breaking out, which she does later on.
One of the last scenes in this episode takes place at the cock fight, where Little Jerry is faced with a huge and skilled opponent. Kramer dives after Little Jerry, trying to protect him, but winds up getting violently pecked by the opposing bird.
Celia is soon tracked down and arrested, and Kurt is also arrested after being mistaken for George because of his baldness. We then see Elaine visiting him in jail due to his fighting one of the arresting officers, and returns his engagement ring after finding out that by the time he gets out (10-14 months), he'll be bald.
Quotes
- (At the cockfight) Jerry: Celia didn't want to come? George: Nah, she's not really into sports.
- Jerry: (about getting married) Your life's gonna totally change. Elaine: Jerry, it's one in the morning; I'm at a cockfight; what am I clinging to?
- Jerry: Kramer, cockfighting is illegal. Kramer: Only in the United States. Jerry: It's inhumane. Kramer: Jerry, it's not what you think. Jerry: It's two roosters pecking at each other! Kramer: What? I thought they had gloves and helmets. You know, likeAmerican Gladiators.
- Kramer: Just because Big Jerry Seinfeld's a has-been doesn't make Little Jerry Seinfeld a never-was!
- Jerry: Little Jerry ran from here to Newman's in under 30 seconds. George: Is that good? Jerry: (shrugs) I don't know.
- George: I've discovered something even better than conjugal visit sex... fugitive sex!!
- Jerry: He just shaves his head for no reason? George: That's like using a wheelchair for the fun of it!
- George: The best part is if things go well… Jerry: Conjugal visits? George: Don't jinx it!
- George: You're in jail? That's so cool!
- George: So Celia is up for parole today. Kramer: Ya, 'Little Jerry' won his first cockfight. George: What? Kramer: Who? (both stare at Jerry) Jerry: I'm too tired.
- (in slow motion) Jerry: Kramer! Elaine: Stop the fight! George: Tamale!
- Kramer: But You should've seen 'Little Jerry' Jerry. Flapping his wings and strutting his stuff. His pecking, and weaving, and bobbin, and talking trash! He didn't even have to touch him. The other rooster ran out of the ring. The whole fight lasted 2 seconds. Jerry: How long do they usually last? Kramer: 5 seconds.
- Jerry: George, this is a little too much for me. Escaped convicts, fugitive sex... I got a cockfight to focus on.
- George:(To Jerry) Allow me. (To Kramer) Why? Kramer: Cage-free, farm-fresh eggs.Jerry: (To George) Allow ME. (To Kramer) What are you, an idiot?
- Jerry:(Explaining to Kramer that he does not have a hen, with a clarity belying his drowsiness at having been awakened by daybreak crowing) That is a rooster. Kramer: Well, that would explain Little Jerry's poor egg production.
- Elaine: (to a bald Kurt) Are you saying that I could be dating this hair? … With you under it.
- Kramer: Little Jerry Seinfeld was born to cock fight!!
- Kramer: The check comes down as long as little jerry wins his cock fight. Jerry: Great… what?! Kramer: Yea Marcelino has cock fights in the back of his store. Jerry: Kramer, cock fighting is illegal. Kramer: (with food in his mouth) Yea, but only in the United States!
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